Thursday, September 23, 2010
This is only one of Many I am sure I will be posting. Instead of getting mad, I have decided to just take pictures when she gets away with things behind my back. Don't get me wrong she still will be instructed and disciplined if needed but this way later when she is older I can show her how naughty she was. haha.
This morning as I was sitting outside praying and seeking the Lord. I told God how I loved Him, but that I always have this thing inside that tries to make me believe that I am not really saved...or that I am not in the Lord's will. I feel like I am always in this place where I KNOW that God is real, I see Him working in my life and in people all around me. I see His joy. I see him create feelings and actions in people that would NEVER come naturally to us.
I can't seem to get passed this. Then as I was sharing what was in my heart to the Lord he spoke. OH HE SPOKE!!! I love how He always does. He always answers. Not matter how immature the question I have or how silly it may be, He always answers me! He loves me that much.
Do you ever really think about how staggering it is that God who made the world that we live in...FOR REAL speaks to us individually?!? Excuse me? Well that is the place I was in after I heard what He had to say. Side note: I get so frustrated that I am still thinking this way, because yes the Lord always gives me what I need to believe and to trust Him but its like "Man if I could get passed this...He could be showing me deeper things" Do you know what I mean? Do I sound like a complete immature fool??
Anyway. As I sat there The verse about faith comes to my head... Its like the Lord said to me... "Briana...what is faith?" And I pull out my "textbook" answer and say. "Well Lord, Faith is the substance of things hoped for, and the evidence of things unseen."
So i thought about it...it is the substance of things HOPED for. that was my revelation. To you it may sound simple. Its something we Hope for. Based off of evidence and substance. We trust and Hope. That is my faith. thats what I do everyday. I have hope and trust in Him. Hope and trust are not just things you acquire but they are based off of what you see and know. Its written in our hearts. Its written in my heart. I believe, and I hope and trust in God. period!
Then He blesses us with His still small voice. He answers our prayers. He fills our hearts with some much joy, in a joyless world. These to me are just more evidence that there is a God. One true God. He is real. AND THAT IS WHY I WORSHIP HIM.
BY the way I was reading Isaiah chapter 51. I think it is my new favorite. "The LORD comforts Zion"
Isaiah 51 :6 "Lift up your eyes to the heavens,And look on the earth beneath. For the heavens will vanish away like smoke, The earth will grow old like a garment, And those who dwell in it will die in like manner; But my salvation will be forever,And MY righteousness will not be abolished."
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
I just wanted to take the time to encourage any newly weds and also share how good the Lord really is. The first year of marriage is so full of joy but also has some very difficult times as well. I am sure you all agree...?
Greg and I recently celebrated our second anniversary!! I cant believe it has been that long. I was told by so many people that its hard when you first get married but i didn't think it would be like that for US. Ha ha! Thats funny. Here is why I thought it was challenging. You have to learn EVERYTHING about your spouse. Things that you cant learn until you are living together. I learned I can say something that is not disrespectful or hurtful or rude at all. BUT the tone that I say it in can change everything!!! I said EVERYTHING. You learn how to talk to them, what tone to say things in, how to ask certain questions with out making them feel stupid, pet peeves they may have. (ie banging your tooth brush on the side of the sink over and over and over because they dont want the water to stay in there) LOL. There are so many different things. They crack me up.
This blog is not to say all the things I learned but to let people who may be discouraged in their marriage or maybe even wanting out. First of all a marriage wont last if it is not centered on the Lord and both people are seeking Him first and filled with the Holy Spirit. With out that it will NEVER be what God intended marriage to be. It is a picture of the intimate relationship that we should all have or do have with the Lord. To know someone in every way possible. An intimate relationship no one else has to know someone body,soul, and spirit. It really is a beautiful thing.
We have been just blown away at how blessed our marriage is. We are growing so close to each other and the Lord. You begin to master each other in every way. Discovering what blesses them most and how to encourage them. The things they need to hear everyday...other than "I love you" You can read them. This all gets better over time. Why do you think all those couples who have been together for 50+ years know what they other is going to say or even what they are thinking. Oh to be devoted to your love for a life time. to be faithful and committed to them not only in your actions but in your mind. With the fear of God.
Marriage is AWESOME! I would never triad it for the world.
Thank the Lord for His grace and mercy to allow us to be blessed with such an amazing gift as men and women.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Our latest (for those of you who have been asking) Is that we are going to be moving to Calais in the Spring. The Lord spoke to Greg about the timing and, I asked the Lord to show me too. :) I trust Greg but I really wanted the Lord to confirm it to me too. May sound like I don't trust him but I really do. ha ha. God is always faithful to speak to us when we listen to him and humbly ask him to speak. I started going through Isaiah a while back and have kind of come and gone to it as i pleased ...sometimes i would just read a psalm or a proverb some days. Ever do that? But I asked Him to show me and then felt like He was directing me back to Isaiah( It had been a few weeks since I had read there) So I picked up where I left off. It was Isaiah 41:9-20 It starts off saying "But you Israel are my servant, Jacob whom I have chosen... and all through out the rest it says, "do not fear, do not be afraid" And how God has chosen us. I didn't feel afraid when Greg told me but I have a feeling that these will comfort my heart in the future. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HOW CLEAR GOD SPEAKS I WOULD READ THE SECTION I TOLD YOU ABOUT. It is so amazing. At the end when I was sitting there baffled at where I "just so happened" to read,and where I "just so happened" to leave off. I was just praying things like "Lord this was written so long ago to a specific group of Your chosen people, do I apply this to my situation now?" I have The Word For Today Bible, on this specific section Chuck had a box basically saying how he wanted us to apply this to our lives today. "I want you to hear the promises of this verse as if God is speaking It to you personally right now" Thats EXACTLY what it said, and more too.
Then just last week I was remembering reading all of this and calling Greg at work in tears so blessed that the God of the universe spoke to ME because I asked Him to. I started to doubt it all. Then at church on Sunday Aaron taught about the "putting out of the fleece" Testing God... and how we are so foolish sometimes that we doubt and ask for another sign...I hope this is not too discombobulated. Any way moral of the story is that it has been confirmed that we are supposed to move in the spring.
We would SO value your prayers. there are still things that need to be worked out. like for instance...
-Job for my husband
-A place to live
You all know what it takes to uproot a family and plant them some where else.
Please pray for us. We covet your prayers.
My husband has been saved for about 4 years now. What a man of God he turned out to be. A man who, as soon as he got saved was radical. Gave up old friends, habits and life style. I fell in love with that man. He turned our school upside down. Convicted "Christians" and inspired dwindling relationships people had with the Lord. That is the man I love. Monday night both the men and the women at MCF had a staff meeting. Greg came home an ordained man. He would never tell anyone that. Aaron said that "ordination" is just recognizing what God has already done. I am so proud of him. He is such a good leader to his family. I could not ask for more of a blessing of a husband. Just wanted to tell you how proud I am of him. :)
Monday, September 13, 2010
Last weekend I started reading/studying the book of Philippians. This is what we are going to be doing this year at MCF womens bible study. I am learning so much. I love a focused study that you can take your time on and really think about. I am excited to see what the Lord is going to do this year. I was not able to go last year because i spent most of my time sitting and nursing an infant. But this year I get to go. :) Yay! Riley and Gregory will have a father daughter morning and Mommy will go and learn more about Jesus. I am so blessed. Life is seasonal and there is a time for everything.
-- Oh and Kay Smith is a very wise women of God, this is her book. (what we will be working through this year.)
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Riley is almost 13 months. I just cant believe all that babies learn in such a short amount of time. Everyone tell us to really enjoy her while she is young. "Its is going to go by too fast" they say. I try to take in every moment, when she wake in the middle of the night and wants to just be cuddled until she falls asleep again I do it with a joyful hart and LOVE every moment of it. BUT i still feel like I am missing everything! It really does go by so fast. And I LOVE being a mom, I love being her mom. I hope someday she will know just how much we love her. I hope I can tell her all the stories about her daddy playing with her and doing things most men dont with a new born baby. And he did it for me and for her.
This is the day we brought her home.
This is what she does. She climbs on everything! she says: dada, mama, duck,store,up, down,all done,yeah, ball, no, star,light,yum, night night, I am sure she says more but I cant think of it right now. Riley started walking too. She took about 6 steps last night. I remember her waking many times at night, sometimes I would get so frustrated because I thought it would always be like that. I thought I would never be done nursing, now she hardly takes a bottle. She wants to do everything herself,eating, walking,drinking,standing,and sitting.
I guess what a lot of parents don't realize is that our job as a parent is to make them independent, I mean if I still had to wipe Riley's butt at 15, I would be very concerned. I don't really know why I am writing this. I don't know if this even makes sense.
Greg and I love our baby girl. She has taught us so much about how our Lord loves and views us. His timing for her was so perfect. I am so thankful and so blessed to have the family that I do.
This is Riley now, literally like 25 minuets ago. I am so in love with this child. I pray that God would give me the grace to raise her up in Him. Knowing how it is to be a a"pastors kid" I know I NEED His wisdom and guidance in raising her. That is my prayer over her every night as she take her bottle and I get those few moments she allows for me to snuggle her. That is what I do.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Hail, thou long expected Jesus, Born to set thy people free: From our sins and fears release us; let us find our rest in Thee. Israel's strength and consolation, hope of all the saints Thou art; Long desired of every nation, Joy of every waiting heart.
Born Thy people to deliver, Born a child, and yet a king, Born to reign in us forever, Now Thy gracious kingdom bring. By Thine own eternal Spirit Rule in all our hearts alone; By Thine own eternal Spirit Rule in all our hearts alone; By Thine all-sufficient merit Raise us to Thy glorious throne. AMEN.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
I have been thinking about what it really is to worship, the title is one of many definitions I found. I really liked this one. When I came to the realization that there is only one true god (God) it created in me a spontaneous worship. Then I started discovering just how much God loves me. So much that He sent His Son, Jesus THE Christ, to die. To become sin. To pay for me so I could... so you could have a relationship with Him. Then after He died, He overcome death and went to the Right hand of God. Now He has given His Spirit. To guide us and lead us. To convict and reveal His will to mankind. This inspires me to worship. This is deity.